so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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