I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
