Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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