And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
