Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
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