I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize
