Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
