Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize
