The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
