They should really pass out barf bags in church
you traded sex for a burrito?
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
