Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
