I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize