Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Randomize
