What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Randomize
