Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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