Can i not drive my cunt home
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize
