I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
