Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
