he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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