You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize