You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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