By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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