Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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