Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
