giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Randomize
