so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
he puts the penis in happiness.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
