If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
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