im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
