at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
