the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
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