They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
