pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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