But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize