She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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