Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
