Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
