i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
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