no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
