I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
