All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
