My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
