Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
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