He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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