Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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