trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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