please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Randomize
