he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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