If you die in college, do you die in real life?
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Randomize
