Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
