do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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