i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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