In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
